Heartbroken
by IHaveAMessedUpSenseOfHumor
Summary: That other gift!fic from melan anime. Double yay! BiseinenSHipping! Rated M for differing reasons.


**Heartbroken**

_**Rudger's Pov**_

"No" I stuttered and stepped back "no, it's not true" I tried to convince myself.

I shook my head and closed the door quietly trying to catch up my breath again. I felt weak, ready to collapse and I leant on the wall of the corridor breathing heavily.

"No, it's not true" I reiterate again and again.

I wanted to believe it. I was trying to clear my mind and I was kept saying to myself that this is not true; that I was dreaming, this _is_ a dream, no this _is_ a nightmare, there is no other way to put it; a _nightmare_, one that will soon be leaving because I'm certainly not dreaming. I wish I is, but no. What I saw was true, an awful true nightmare.

I saw him; yes him, the one I love, the only man who make my heart beat faster. I can still remember the first day I saw him.

He was in a need of an assistant and I made my way into the labs along with my brother. I bit lip; I don't want to think about my brother right now.

I rewrote my resume and had to pass through an interview and I did. This was the first time I laid my eyes on him and from that moment I felt my life was changing dramatically.

Yes, my life changed, my heart too, my ways, my thoughts, my principles, my beliefs, everything changed because of him.

I changed for _him_. I went against everything I knew only for _him_; because my heart fell for _him_.

I didn't know what he was thinking, how he felt about me, about _us_; even if there was any 'us'. But I was doing anything and everything he told me to do. More work in the lab, more hours until late night. Crazy requests he was asking from only me. I started to feel special, started to hope that maybe there was 'us'.

But every time I tried to get a little closer to him and to his heart his was pushing me away.

Every time I tried to confess my true feelings and my love he changed the subject by saying we had a lot of work to do.

But I knew it; I was feeling his hesitation, his fears and also his love for me.

He loved me, he returned my feelings. But he was married; he was committed himself with a woman which clearly he didn't love her anymore. He loved me; me not her, me and only me.

He was trying to find pretexts and excuses to be absent from home and spend more time with me. And I know that, I'm sure about it, because he told me.

He couldn't take it anymore, neither could I. My love for him was like a poison flowing in my veins. His cold behavior was killing me slowly every day until one night I went to work only to announce that I quit; quit from my job, from my efforts, from my useless attempts to approach him more.

I was trying hard to keep my voice calm and accepted my faith when he finally melted the ice between us and almost begged me to stay.

He confessed his love, his hidden feelings and I needed only one second before I wrapped his face in one hand and pulled his face on mine crashing hard my lips against his.

He kissed me back with the same passion and I let myself to love him even more. I stripped myself from everything; doubts, fears, clothes, I was his and he was mine.

I was fully trusted him.

And that was my biggest_ mistake_.

"Why?" I asked out loud seeking desperately for an answer "why him? Great Lord of the underground why him?"

I banged my fist in the wall trying to hold back my temper.

Of all the men in word he chose to commit himself with... _Rex_. Of course he doesn't know about us. I never told him and he never suspected a thing.

But he knew, he knows my feelings and still he is in the next room along with Rex. I saw them kissing passionately removing each other clothes. I swallow with difficulty closing my eyes with force trying to erase the images, of him and my brother.

He knows my feelings but he chose to betray me with my own little brother. He did it on purpose to hurt me. I hate him, I really do!

"I hate him" I said and the same time the words escaped my mouth I felt something approached me. Something dark which entered my head making me crazy from jealousy and madness, erasing all of my logic?

"I will make him pay" I shouted but my voice was harder and colder like it wasn't actually mine "Dr. Fudo will regret for hurting me like this" I stated and I knew what I had to do.

**A gift story form melan anime to IHaveAMessedUpSenseOfHumor. BiseinenShipping: Rex/Rudger/Dr. Fudo**

Hope you enjoyed ^_^


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